sorry , repost ignore this post
On subject of nephew, anytime you hear or feel him wonder \' What\'s wrong with me?\' you need to TELL him that there is NOTHING wrong with HIM. He is NOT the one drunk and stoned out of his mind, he is NOT the one without enough brains to come in out of the rain. He is merely unlucky that his mom is No Damned Good. I realize that this will conflict with your policy about not dissing parents. No Prob, there IS a loophole. You may FREELY dis the female who bore him, as he HAS no Mother except YOU. I freely and loudly disrespect anyone and everyone who merits it in front of my children, INCLUDING myself. When the baby asks me why I smoke, I tell her sincerely that Daddy smokes because he is Stupid. Anyone in this house who makes a mistake because they did not think, or were not watching what they were doing gets an ass-tearing. ESPECIALLY me, because I KNOW better, and screwed up anyway. This seems to show the girls that blundering along with Head Up Ass is Wrong, which is what I WANT them to see, and AVOID. When the oldest asks me why people get high, I tell her it is because they are Yellow Cowards who can\'t stand on their feet and face the Big, Bad ,World. People who lay drunk all the time, same thing. Learned that from the Old Man, who was a weekend drunk all my life, til just a couple years back. I respect ONLY those who Merit it, and disrespect those who merit that, as well. If you don\'t point things out to kids, how can they learn? The oldest has a BAD problem with Nagging. So do I. I can\'t tolerate ANY amount of being nagged about ANYTHING, as my Mom was a nagging-ass well, you get the idea. So when the oldest nags me, she gets NOTHING. If I have to be a bastard to teach her that, it will be worth it in the rejection and heartbreak that she DOESN\'T cause herself. But if you allow a child to get the idea that they are somehow unfit, or unworthy of being Loved, you might as well shoot them yourself. The Longest and Hardest Lesson I EVER learned is that it\'s NOT always that I\'M screwed up, but that it\'s the OTHER person who is. The oldest is being driven nuts by Peer Pressure, and I am terrified that this will lead to her death, as she can\'t understand that fools and idiots ALWAYS want you to be an idiot, too. I can\'t make her understand that that the ONLY people whose opinion of her counts are Her, God, And Me and Boss Lady, and everyone else can go to Hell and fry there. She is more worried about what kids in school think of her than ANYONE else on Earth or out of it. She has never lived in town, but acts exactly like an idiotic City girl. This scares me more than I have vocabulary to describe.Fortunately, she is not boy-crazy.
Some of her 13 and 14 year old friends ARE. They\'ll be raped and/or pregnant by 16, and I live in fear that they will cause mine to be hurt, too, because then people will die. She has ADHD, and is not the least bit dumb, she\'s a smart girl, but her head is denser than depleted uranium, so it\'s a major bitch to teach her anything. But once you DO, she\'s GOT it. So I have to use somewhat draconic teaching methods. And I hate it, now, but if I succeed, then it will be worth it, as she will be a good and happy woman. Not easy sharing your own heartbreaks with your kids, but it DOES make a lasting impression on them, and they CAN learn from it. And teaching the kids is ALL of our Primary Responsibility in Life. I believe it is wrong to shelter them from how fucked up the World and People are, after a certain age. All that does is raise up more sheep for the Wolves to slaughter and live off of. I want my girls to be like Sheep Dogs. Hard-working, caring, loyal Friends, who will rip the face off of any wolf dumb enough to mess with them. I have been accused of being as Hard as a Grade 8 bolt. Sometimes I AM. I didn\'t used to be. The World and fucked up People MADE me that way. I was raised in a time when people didn\'t steal little kids and rape them to death, and a cop was the man you looked for when you needed Help. As the first Law of Nature is those who fail to adapt do not survive, I suppose I have merely Evolved. I don\'t like everything about me, but the World does, because that\'s how it made me, and I\'m still here. And just think, I was a Kid, once.
KY Jim
So deal with my smiles dammit!
